How revisiting Jim Morrison’s poetry got me all sentimental (and then broke my middle-aged heart)

Written By Benne van der Velde

Last week I finally began to write this feature about the poetry of Jim Morrison. Mostly because I’m a magazine’s parent now and that zine needs to be spoon fed content on a regular basis to stay alive, and hopefully even thrive. Priorities, he? + I’ve always been a gigantic fan, so, loving feeder that I also am, I went online and found a (as rebelliously illegal) link to his Lost Writings part 1. Which got me all riled up, and to be honest, quite sentimental too?

Some background

In 1995 I broke up with my first girlfriend in the worst possible way. She did not see it coming, and it broke her heart. I broke her heart, not being able to explain to myself (let alone to her) why, and instead of trying to then figure that out + maybe start working through some of the shit that I’ve been carrying with me my whole life, I, like so, so many other disturbed 20-something-or-others turned to rigorous self-medicating… And poetry. Made completely new friends, who shared my lust for (often drug-fueled) self-expression and we started to submerge ourselves in any and all music, poetry and art we deemed worthy of our truly amazing powers of observation…, like binging ‘The Wall’ for weeks on end. On one of these evenings (must have been 1996) Gino introduced me to The Doors. Blew my fucking mind right then and there. We started making freak tapes, incorporating ‘An American Prayer’ into those wherever we could and must have watched the movie  more times than we did Apocalypse Now (which is saying a lot). What really got to me, though, was Jim’s poetry. The sheer… freedom of it was intoxicating, making it just as irresistible as the weed and hasjies had become. And soon after that about as necessary as well, helping me shape (and therefor look at) myself in ways I could live with...

From an interview in a 1998 issue of Barflyer magazine about our (Gino, Sander and I) very first poetry exhibition: ‘There are plans to record a cd in the style of Jim Morrison’s “An American Prayer” … Benne (who bears a resemblance to the Doors singer)…’

Skip to 25+ years later

Needless to say, it played a rather huge role during those re-formative years, and when I started putting together what I wanted to become a true tribute, a full on 12 course feast of recognition and praise I… couldn’t? I read through it wanting nothing more, unable to believe what I had just read, or rather, hadn’t, so read through it again. Scouring for the signs of brilliance that had once captivated me to no end… Still nothing. And again…  What the fuck? First all warm fuzzy from thinking about a misty but friend filled past, and now this. At which point I became real life like emotional because

 

I find most of it sucks balls now?

I’m not talking about the music, or the lyrics in combination with that incredible music. As a front man and performer, he was in a league of his own, true enough. Brilliant. Genius. Haunting. Haunted. Me and millions like me wanted to BE him, kidding ourselves that we could fake a fraction of the presence Jim commanded on stage. So, I tried yet AGAIN, and my hardest to like this one for example…:

… I mean, sorry, but what the fuck even IS that? And so cocky, so bloody sure of himself… Jim’s intuitive, free form associational way of writing rubs me COMPLETELY the wrong way now… Somehow. Getting riled up again…! Here’s another doozy:

Why does this infuriate me so goddamn much! Lazy! Throw your first thought on paper and call it poetry why don’t you! Or wait, this fucking one:

… Sod this.

After having to put it aside for a few days to cool off

I had a good talk with my wife yesterday. About this piece. During which I gave her every reason as to why I’m so affected by all of this? I’d come prepared this time. Newly discovered and therefor profusely bleeding generational gap, Herman van Veen albums featuring lyrics by Rob Chrispijn because craftmanship is key and me growing into that philosophy myself over the decades, and quite a few dismissals of poems of his an sich, using any and all tools I had learned studying Writing For Performance. I made my case. It was a very solid case. Showing her different articles and discussions about this very topic, why they matter and where I stand in relation to those expertly put together pieces and opinions. She listened, smiled, totally agreed (!) and then added a few thoughts to the mix herself… Conclusion: I am angry mainly because I eventually DID have to grow up? It’s resentment, is all. Pure and simple. Thanks, my love. So, there you go!

Fucker.

Back

 

Benne van der Velde

After thoroughly enjoying the Dutch slam poetry scene in the early and mid 2000s (with wins in 7 cities and eventually a place in the Nationals of 2012) and performances at the Lowlands-, Uitmarkt- and Parade festivals a/o, Benne successfully made the transition from the stage to paper by signing his first publishing deal in 2005. Since then 4 publishing houses (kleine Uil, Douane, Nadorst and Stanza) released volumes of his poetry. For a 5th (Passage) he co-edited an anthology of satirical/pamphlet poetry with fellow poets Daniel Dee and Alexis de Roode.

As a member of the artist movement ‘Het Ongeboren Idee’ he helped to organize (and was part of/presented) cultural lo-fi festivals, exhibitions, making a movie, monthly poetry stages in his hometown of Vlaardingen (Poezie in De Steeg), Rotterdam (De Poetsclub) and Nijmegen (Late Letteren Live) + a talent show for bands.

In 2002 and 2003 he studied ‘writing for performance’ at the vocational university of the Arts in the city of Utrecht (HKU) and as a result saw 3 of his theater plays make it to a stage. Writer Hiekelien van den Herik and he co-wrote a knight spectacle play complete with real choreographed sword fights, men in heavy plate armor and more great stuff like that. Theater-/enactment group Ridderspoor performed said play in 2004 and 2005 at Het Archeon, during De Kasteeldagen and at an Elfia-fantasy fair. He also gave numerous poetry and rap workshops at schools and other institutions. There were a lot of collabs too, for example voice-over work for a Rock Opera, a monumental art project for which he partnered up with the artist Erwin Adema and thrice alongside the R.J.S.O (The Rotterdam Youth Symphony Orchestra).

Benne has been an editor for several literary magazines (Krakatau, Renaissance and Op Ruwe Planken), at one time he and his wife owned a secondhand bookstore, he’s been the official poet laureate for his hometown of Vlaardingen and released his first and only Dutch rap-EP in 2011. In 2012 he rapped his way into the finals of Art Rocks. An EP with songs in English followed in 2021. A year later he started translating Dutch musical and lyrical classics from Dutch into English, and vice versa. Some of his short sci-fi and fantasy stories have found their way to medium related websites, magazines and anthology’s.

According to the poet himself rewriting his own poetry, lyrics and prose in English somehow feels like the next logical step in his career, a way to open up to the world at large. Which is both exhilarating and terrifying. So far several of these translations have been published in Bebarbar, Hare’s paw, Festivalforpoetry, Punt Volat, The Dewdrop, The Dillydoun Review and Months to Years a/o.

In everyday (some claim real) life he worked as an industrial tank cleaner, in pest control, on a garbage truck, driving a forklift, in a chemical waste facility, on a Ferry and 10 years as a bartender in a cannabis bar. At the time of writing this resume he can be found at home or in the hospital battling throat cancer. He’s been off the Herb since 2008, has a wife, 2 dogs, mild anxiety issues and likes to read every sci-fi and fantasy classic he can find.

www.linkedin.com/in/benne-van-der-velde-8b17a7296

The poet/lyricist and author Rob Chrispijn: ‘Benne writes sentences that stick; clean, dark and intense. This way a poem lasts!’

The poet Philip Hoorne on the website Poetry rapport: ‘There’s a genius hiding in Benne van der Velde, those are the Good Tidings of today. Amen.’

https://www.doubledutchmagazine.com
Next

Going Dutchtube!, nr. 2 (Vrouwkje Tuinman reads her poem ‘Iemand die ik liever mis’/‘Someone I would rather go without’ in Dutch & English)