Beware the Jabberwock

‘twas piddly on the dating app, all swoped.
Blagged Saturday, ‘twould dine alone, frenn zoned,
When slavidly dum pings kabonged laud deer.
Who you? Who you? I darst respond. Quix cheer
Was skrilt with quaintest text ― signed Jabberwock.

One, two, three, four, smirkly vorred, he foxed
His pricksome self into my bed, pretense
And guile his game ― though married to Hortense!

Soon swole-mad belly carried twins. Ah, me.
His visiting decreased unhappily.

One, two, three, four loud whacks upon his door.
Hortense appeared, prussed grucched at me full bore.
I seized my vorpal blade, snick-snicked my stock
To skin, discovering my Jabberwock
Was drabbed in drag. Fake “wife” was really him.
I druped him bloody, then galumphed rage-rimmed.

‘twas fiddly with Lamaze and newborn apps.
His Ma sued me for wrongful death. Bitch-slapped,
I hate-romanced his Pa, gave him the clap,
Returning grap his son spreefed ― rude lagniappe.

‘twas one year since they buried Jabberwock.
His manxome spirit’s vexed when cradles rock.

Inspired by “Jabberwocky” by Lewis Carroll [1832 – 1898]